Have you ever canceled an employee?

What I mean by "canceling" is to avoid the uncomfortable and complicated process of coaching and feedback; instead, mentally add the employee to a RIF waitlist, tolerate their poor performance until the time comes, then terminate them. Easy, right? No personal blame for firing (instead, we blame financial performance or whatever reasoning is being peddled for the RIF), no tedious performance management plans…no compassion, no feedback, and no leadership.

I'm noticing more well-intentioned, kind leaders opting into canceling instead of coaching employees. Although a seemingly convenient way to cut through performance management red tape, this practice is cruel and an abdication of responsibility.

One of my coaching clients recently said, "I have given feedback to this employee on a few occasions, and his behavior hasn't changed. I've tried to coach him, but I've given up. He is a performance problem and needs to leave."

My response to him was, "Are you certain he comprehended your feedback and precisely understands what you expect? Perhaps confusion, not inability, is to blame for the lack of behavior change."

Let's be honest; we suck at giving actionable, comprehendible feedback. We're often unintentionally ambiguous and spark defensiveness in the receiver, which causes their brain to shift into a threat state. When someone gets defensive, their brain deregulates and can't think clearly. Conversely, if we're uncomfortable or nervous when giving feedback, our messages are likely confusing.

There's hope! Giving feedback doesn't have to be uncomfortable and discouraging. But often, these conversations go sideways and don't result in behavior change. It's no wonder many have fallen into the cycle of canceling employees; it's just easier.

There is a better way, friends.

I've curated a simple yet profoundly impactful framework on how you can give feedback in a brain-friendly way that yields better performance and behavior change. It only takes 6 minutes to watch and is oh-so-worth it. Click here to watch.

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